Popular life coach and relationship adviser, Solomon Buchi has shared some relationship tips on how to stay faithful to your partner.
Buchi stressed cheating in many cases is the end point of a lot of loose boundaries, and therefore, advised people in relationships to learn to keep boundaries.
Although Buchi’s advice mainly targeted the male folks, the tips are applicable for the female folks as well, married and single alike.
7 tips to stay faithful to your partner
1. Be a faithful boyfriend first
Many single men live outrageously randy lives with multiple girlfriends, side chics, etc and expect to be one content & faithful husband in marriage. Nah
Discipline breeds discipline. You will not become a man you’ve not practiced. Faithfulness is a habit; start with your dating relationships, because if you can’t be a faithful boyfriend, you most likely won’t be a faithful husband. Simple.
2. Stay away from pre-marital sexual experiences as much as you can
Nothing justifies cheating, however, some men cheat because they expect their wives to be a combination of the Chioma, Fatima, Sandra, Ronke, who they’ve had different sexual escapades with.
You see, we cannot be wiser than God. Even from a psychological standpoint, abstinence makes sense. Too many premarital sexual encounters end up in unhealthy comparisons in marriage. You love your wife, but she doesn’t moan like Yemi. She doesn’t do this like an ex.
3. Avoid friends who are not faithful in their relationships
If you’re a man with noble values and you roll with corrupt men, one day you’ll want to get a taste of what they do. Keep close friends who are faithful, pride in it and encourage it. It’s easy to be what you see.
4. Learn to build boundaries
Listen, everyone can cheat! If you’re in a highly vulnerable and compromising corner, you will cheat. That’s why some call it a mistake, because it wasn’t intended, but was a result of recklessness and lack of boundaries.
Don’t trust yourself too much! Build boundaries with people. They can’t call you at some times, they can’t talk to you about some things. You know why Joseph ran away when Potiphar’s wife came for him? He didn’t trust himself! He ran! Set boundaries like you don’t trust you self
Cheating in many cases is the end point of a lot of loose boundaries. So avoid conversations, people, and things that will even put you there. Tighten the screws of your boundaries and be unapologetic about it.
5. Be open to your woman about everything
EVERYTHING! It’s easy to be faithful when you’re not hiding anything. When secrecy creeps into a relationship, unfaithfulness is bound to happen, because sin thrives in secrecy. Let your woman/wife know everything.
It doesn’t have to be big secrets please. Things as little as how your female work colleague complimented you in an unusual way or how some random girl sent you an innocently mushy message on IG. These little things help a great deal.
6. Communicate your needs with your partner
Unmet needs should lead to more communication not jumping out to get them met. The sex isn’t so pleasing? Speak to your wife. They don’t say the things you love to hear? Speak to your wife. Learn together!
7. Be ready to adjust and adapt
If you’re not ready to adjust in some ways, stay single. Relationships require adjustments and adapting, of course in a healthy way. “This is how I am” doesn’t cut it. You’re dating someone else and you need to satisfy their needs, or just date yourself.
In addition, always remember what you stand to lose when you cheat. A relationship/marriage that you’ve built for years is not worth ruining it with some minutes of pleasure – pleasure your woman can actually give you (for married folks).
If it’s possible, have older faithful couples that you are accountable to. Couples who you’ve seen walk and work in faithfulness. Surround yourself with as many as possible.
And finally, yield yourself to the Holy Spirit. He kills fleshy desires in us.